yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
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