he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
