if i can run in heels then i can drive
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
