I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
