Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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