the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
