So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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