What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize