i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
