Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
