You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
