well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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