Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
