He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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