If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Randomize