I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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