____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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