Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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