so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
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