Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
