He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
There's even glitter on my cock...
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