But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
