i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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