Tell her she can't have a vagina
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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