Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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