Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
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I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
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Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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