i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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