Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
FUCK WHALES
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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