We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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