I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
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Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize