so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
