ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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