the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
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