Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
