my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
