When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
