I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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