DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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