let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Randomize