whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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