So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
