I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Best friends brother. Beat that.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
