Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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