Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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