No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
