in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
