i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize