I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
