I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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