I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
